I was addicted for years

I’ve been addicted since 2011.

The first time I saw that blue themed website load on my screen with the message:

“Facebook helps you connect and share with the people in your life.”

With the added ‘bonus’:

“It’s free and anyone can join.”

“Well, this is fun!” I thought, as I hammered in my email ID and password to be part of the next best thing since myspace.

It was fun to begin with. Everyone was on it:

• Classmates

• Neighbours

• Relatives

Everyone counted as a ‘friend’ and, the higher the count, the ‘cooler’ you were.

You could plant virtual farms which had the audio effect of raking in coins as you ‘clicked them’ indicating a successful harvest. (Farmville if anyone remembers)

Exchanging virtual gifts, sending ‘pokes’ and tagging people in random posts to get ‘likes’ only for me to realise over the last two years that this was an addiction.

The worst bit? This was an addiction by design.

Little did I know back then, the damage this caused. This was further compounded by Instagram where we have this incessant urge to share a ‘story’ about anything.

This went into overdrive in 2020 (thanks to a certain virus) where our best source of entertainment after being contained within 4 walls was our phone.

Missing people? Instagram

Feeling bored? YouTube

Want messages and likes? Share memes and post reels.

I reached a point where I couldn’t handle it. I knew something was off. Well, I didn’t have to wait till 2020 to realise that, but ‘The Social Dilemma’ was the tipping point.

It collectively highlighted the different struggles I (or people around me) went through on a daily basis.

While this documentary has several nuances I could address, for the purpose of keeping it short(er) I shall refrain.

The point of focus here is addiction.

Who’s addicted? You. Why are you addicted?

You either have no clue OR you blame yourself, your lack of willpower and focus.

I’ve tried all the apps and tools marketed to reduce distractions and improve focus. They work, but only when you’re mentally conditioned and aware of the underlying problems (and this can get a little tricky).

There are two parts to understand here:

1. The cause of our problems

2. The source of our solutions

We procrastinate sleep (cause of problem) to look at our screens. Why? Because we want to be rewarded (solution)

We ignore people (problem) to look at our phones (solution) because we’re bored.

We watch productivity videos (solution) to feel accomplished (problem)

Understand the problem - and working on it (slowly)

The first ‘win’ when dealing with a problem is awareness of the problem itself. How?

When you’re aware, you’re better equipped to prepare yourself because you know when the ‘problem’ is about to begin.

One of the reasons we’re addicted to our devices is because they are designed that way. By knowing the designs that drive your addiction, you can:

• Understand what you’re susceptible to

• Prevent cue points from triggering these behaviours

Understanding you’re addicted is one thing. Identifying the reason, you’re addicted is another.

The second bit is working on why you feel a certain way.

Why do you resort to cheap dopamine?

• You’re not used to boredom?

• You’ve been doing a lot and want to feel better?

The reason might require some reflection but here’s what I can leave you with for today (based on what works for me)

Feeling low on energy

If you feel tired all day, there’s a high chance you sleep less. Watching Netflix at night will not fix that. Sleeping better will.

Spending some time on fixing your sleep will do you more good than any app or sitcom.

This, obviously, takes time and being patient with yourself is essential.

So, what’s the cause of your problem? Or, if you have a problem are you aware that there is one?

I’ve had my fair share of combating digital addiction. If you have something that bothers you, hit ‘reply’ and let me know (and if you found this useful, share it with a friend maybe?)

I read all my mails, so I’d happily help you out.

Until then,

Cheers
Rainar